I cannot thank you enough for the home and life you gave me, especially the love and care you sheltered me in for 18 years. It’s been truly fantastic. I know that you’ve fought through countless battles and would always come out on top, whether you lost or won them – your flawless optimism overpowered the chances. Undoubtedly, you’ve been the greatest gift to my family and me, because your free-spirited mind and motherly knack had always been so warm, so welcoming and so understanding.
Whenever you were down, we had always been by your side – even now. And through the years, you’ve taught me valuable lessons: you’ve shown me the things that an individual doesn’t see, but yourself; you’ve told me to take people as they come, and if they were brought up in such a way, you said to embrace it and believe that somewhere deep inside their soul, there is a light, waiting to be found – it was only a matter of time until that right person or event was to surface that.
You always had that ‘sixth sense’ about people. It may have not been absolutely 100%, but you were close to see through people. That sort of brushed off onto me, but unfortunately weakened as I grew older. I became blind to people’s entities. I’d end up trusting the wrong people, even when you warned me to be careful of them. It would only take one little pin-prick, and they would turn. I’d return to you, a mess, tell you the hell I went through, and you’d only say “I warned you, sweetheart”. Nodding, I knew I should’ve known better. I guess it was always in me. I wanted to impress, and by doing so, I would bite my tongue and let myself be pushed around. As those times became regular, a dangerous energy infested me, I soon became something so disapproving; my scathing anger was the result of my heart’s enragement. I would fight. I would hurt. It pained you, I knew it did. I heard it in your voice whenever I came back to tell you about it. You said I held a passionate nature that always wanted to seek acceptance, only because the idea of being lost frightened me. You knew I’d go about, silently, keeping my opinions to myself, until finally, I exploded. Bottling up thoughts is and will always be the worst thing to do.
So now, here I am, writing you a letter, telling you that I love you, reminding myself what is to come. I could always ask you what I should do, but you’re going to look at me and say “Embrace it, my darling”. Although, you already have, and I’ve shook my head in denial. I don’t want to go back; I’m here for a reason. I’m here for you – all of us are.
You’ve been amazing to me, and I cannot thank you enough for the life you’ve given me. You’ll be missed deeply – always and forever.
Lots of love from